Bread Crumbs In The Butter

Things you should know about me ...

• 9 times out of 10, my socks don't match. Yes, this is another trend I started. Ask my friend Moyra, who has known me for almost eight years. She has hated my mismatched feet since 2005!
• Now that you know that, you have to know that there is an exception. If I am wearing pajamas or sweat pants I am always wearing pristine, matching white socks. It is a strict rule of mine that you can never, ever, wear anything buy white socks with loungewear.
• People who are not in a hurry confound me. My daughter Kristyn saunters everywhere she goes like she doesn't have a care in the world or a specific time to be anywhere. I need to know that I am making progress toward where I am going and if I am moving anything but at breackneck speed, I am wasting time.
• Besides Friends, I don't think I've ever watched a TV show all the way through. I just don't have eight years to find out how someone finally found a wife or whether or not some crazy med student marries the doctor who is supposed to be mentoring her on her first day.
• I would rather fill a sink with hot, soapy water and have the satisfaction of washing and drying dishes immediately than load the dishwasher, turn it on and wait hours only to unload the freaking thing again.
• I don't like Michael Douglas as a person, but love his movies. Same as Tom Cruise. I don't know what that says about me, but thought you should know.
• I hate feet. Feet are gross. Trust me, mine are really gross.
• I cry when I'm angry, but rarely when I'm sad. If happen to be fighting and I cry, run. Especially if I am holding an object that I can throw.
• I can't stand the band Rush.  You know how some people fall asleep counting sheep? Put Rush on for me and I'm out like a light.
• I have a soft spot for Britney Spears. I don't know why I am rooting for her like I am. I gave up on Lindsay Lohan though - but The Parent Trap will always be one of my favourite movies. That could simply be because of Dennis Quaid though.
• Lists. I love lists.

A conversation with my son

A month or so ago, as I was making dinner and he was doing his homework, Alex and I had a conversation about the size of our family and his desire for a male sibling.

"I want a brother" he said. "I have three sisters and no brother. That's not fair and those girls are mean!"

He has a point. Those girls are champions at doing all of the things that older sisters are supposed to do to their brother to make him wish he was not only an only child, but that girls from all over the world were banished to an island in the Pacific until they were needed for procreation.

I replied "Alex, I am not having another baby. Sorry, buddy, this is it!"

He thought about it and said "No, I know. But how about we adopt one? A boy. Who is the same age as me?"

Maybe I had some born-in mother sense that told me how the rest of this conversation was going to play out, because while lovely in theory, the idea of having another person to be responsible for in this house just isn't feasable for me. Still, I humoured him.

"Yeah. We should look into it! But he has to be in the same grade, but younger than me, so born after February.  And he can't be better looking than me, cause he will steal all the girls. And you can't tell him he's your most favourite boy in the whole world like you say to me..."

I could see his nine year old brain working and processing through what he was saying. I saw the progression.  I've lived that progression as I start out with what I think is a phenomenal idea and unleash it into the world before I have realized on my own that it's just plain horrible to even consider.

"Wait ..." he said. "This is a bad idea. Forget I said anything!"

And that was the last word in the Alexander Sibling Conversation.

Words

I love words. Shocking, I know. I've written almost eight hundred posts on this blog - and that's just here!  Words are my life. I say millions of them a day.  At varying levels of volume! And I never, ever, ever exagerate them!

I get stuck on catch phrases a lot, as we all do. Right now it's hard for me to get through any conversation without saying "As if!" or "I know, right?"  They seem harmless, but it's hard to increase my credibility with senior government officials when one of those slips out.  Also not condusive to being taken seriously?  Exclaiming "I know, right!?" when someone compliments your briefing note writing skills.

My family gets stuck on them too, but theirs are highly annoying. If I have to hear "ermegherd" or "jam it in ya" one more time I'm going to beat someone with a dictionary telling them if they continue to mess with the English Language the English Language is going to mess them up.

One type of word I love is the onomatopoeia, which means a word that suggests or imitates the sound that it describes.  My carpool friend and I enjoy nothing more than a good early morning comparison of our newest favourites.  Words like "fluffy" or "slippery" or "prickly". 

I also dig making word observations and sending out ramdon BBMs to friends that say things like:

"Know what's akward? The word "awkward". True story. I had to retype that four times just to get it right and it always looks wrong."

or

"Someone just said "Excuse me, ma'am. Did you axe for the extra large two cream half sugar? Axe? Really? When did this become okay?"

That is, when I'm not sending random BBMs about outfits I see in my building at work ... I'll save those for another time!